Beyond my Gaza, I see the whole Universe

Fidaa Abu Assi- During my silent hours, I travel. So lost in thoughts, my eyes journey from earth to heaven, from this tiny spot of Gaza to the whole Cosmos, from the world’s biggest prison to absolute freedom. The sky. The sea. The sand. And the seagulls. With my strong power of meditation on each, I can heal myself. They say I lack some communication skills; perhaps I do, but at least I can communicate with myself. I need neither a psychiatrist nor a neurologist. I haven’t ever needed a doctor or visited a clinic during my lifetime; I know pretty well how to cure myself when I undergo some mental dysfunctions, maybe, due to the stresses and strains of life in Gaza. My hours of silence make everyone around wonder what on earth I am doing. Nothing, I am just enjoying “the sweetness of doing nothing.” I am actually seeing a unique work of art. In these divine moments, at least I don’t feel the siege. I am free—momentarily, anyway.

...With my family’s constant interruptions of my reverie, staying at home can’t be the best choice. I want to feel the presence of none. I need to hear not the slightest sound of anything; especially, when I am subjected to the roaring sound of generators on a daily basis? I’m getting sick of every-routine-thing we started to take for granted in Gaza. I grow madder and madder than ever before. I keep losing my temper. I struggle to keep it, however.

...On the beach, I chose a spot where nobody but my friend and I there. With open arms, I welcome the air inside my body. I keep gazing at the miraculous sky, feeling indescribable freedom. I keep an eye on its pretty clouds, observing its different formations and color patterns. An absolute masterpiece! I spend hours looking at the sea rolling waves while lapping on the shore. What fascinates me the most is the scene of the seagulls hovering in the sky. It does cross my mind what I studied about romanticism. It wasn’t till I’ve experienced first-hand such overwhelming nature that I got to know what the romantics mean when they say that NATURE is their subject of inspiration and imagination as one can find everything in nature. As the seagulls flying in the sky, I observe their movements as if they were holding a meeting in mid-air discussing which direction they have to take. “Are they leaving Gaza to somewhere else?” to myself I thought. Let alone the changing color and heat of the sunlight, sometimes I can’t open my eyes due to its strong rays and other-times I shiver due to its cold rays. In twinkling, I see the whole universe suddenly changes. I once wondered “isn’t Gaza part of the cosmos, so when it would change to the better one day”.

“You can see the beauty of the universe from your place in Gaza”, a well-know Palestinian Astrophysicist and Space Scientist, Dr. Suleiman Baraka once imparted in one of his activities in Gaza entitle “Astronomy For Peace.” Now I know pretty well what he means. I feel divine peace in heaven, divine freedom in the sky and divine equality in the sand. Look up the sky and feel no restriction, no siege and no whatsoever barrier at all. I, continually, come to the sea to find some peace in air, sea and sky, away from the chaotic life of Gaza.

When I sent my friend some snaps of the sky and the beach, she was amazed by Gaza’s beauty. “Is this really Gaza? Our Gaza? You made me love it even more than before” she gasped. “Yes, but we were blinded by its tragedies,” I answered.Read more